Going Home

It's hard to believe that this whole thing started only a week ago.  It was Wednesday in Samoa and Trevor called me from work in the middle of the day and asked me to pick him up.  I knew that something must be terribly wrong. I dropped Noah at our wonderful neighbor's house and made the ten minute drive to Trevor's work in only five.

The news was truly as awful as I had imagined. Trevor's father had been given only a short time to live.  We called home that afternoon and spoke with his father.  He sounded very week, but very calm. He told us  "I am not afraid to die.  I have lived a good life and I would not change a thing."  Hearing his voice both soothed us and made us want to see him right away.  That night, when Trevor saw our sweet children, he had an overwhelming urge to take them home to see their Grandpa, and that is just what he did.

On Thursday, Trevor notified his boss that he would be ending our contract early.  On Friday, I bought tickets home and Trevor had his last day of work.  Saturday we sold everything we owned except the shirts on our backs and a few books and personal items.  Sunday we said goodbye to most of the people we know.  On Monday, the kids had their last day of school while Trevor and I tried to pack, clean house, pay bills, rent, etc.

Then, on Tuesday morning, just before leaving for the airport, Trevor and I had a sudden, still moment while sitting in the car and waiting for our gas to be pumped.  We were talking about all of the things that we wished we had time to do before we left Samoa.  I said, "One minute you are living your everyday life, and the next you are holding your ticket home."  My word just hung in the air as their deeper meaning sunk in.........later that day, we boarded the plane and said goodbye to our beautiful Samoa.

I have been in Utah for 3 days now, and in that time I have been thinking alot about the lessons that Samoa has taught me. When I swept and cleaned my Mother-in-laws kitchen, I thought about my dear friend who cleaned my entire house in the midst of our last-day chaos.  I wanted to pass that on.  When I found myself watching all of the grandchildren, I thought about our sweet neighbors who tended our children innumerable times and I wanted to pass that on.  I thought of friends who fed me and my children, either just for fun on a Sunday night, or in times of stress or crisis.  I am trying to pass that on.  I thought of the many who gave rides to my children and I am trying to buy a bigger car so I can pass that on too!  Samoa has taught me to be grateful for small and precious things, that waiting for something often makes it better.  It has taught me see a need and fill it, to do something really generous simply because it feels SO good, and most of all, how to live my life as though I am already holding my ticket home.